Chicken goes on the run after “terrorizing bank customers”

Chickens don’t have a reputation for feistiness. If they did, their name wouldn’t be a term for a cowardly person.

However, one fowl specimen in Louisiana appears determined to change all that.

Police in Walker, near Baton Rouge, were dispatched to a bank in the town on Friday following reports of a decidedly paltry incident.

An “aggressive chicken” was on the loose and causing mayhem, according to the police department’s subsequent call for help to locate the feathered suspect.

Even though cops were on the scene in minutes, the animal, perhaps acting on a tip off, had already scarpered. Bank officials were left to recite a litany of the bird’s alleged crimes to responding officers.

The tenacious chicken had been “terrorizing bank customers all week” at both the walk-up and drive-thru ATM, police said. Its MO was to chase customers and attempt to enter their vehicles, all while failing to observe “proper social distancing.”

When a thorough search of the area, including the kitchen of a nearby restaurant, drew a blank, officers had to content themselves with issuing a description: “a reddish-tan chicken, approximately 18” tall and 6-8 lbs in weight.”

Sensibly, the public have been urged not to approach the fowl given its previous.

As of Monday night, the police department’s original post had already reached over 114,000 people, according to Captain John Sharp.

“The (mostly) true post was prepared upon the belief that we could all use a little humor during this remarkable period we are all experiencing,” he said.